London Saints

BATCOMBE v LONDON SAINTS, Batcombe CC, July 15th 2022 – 35 overs

Conditions: bloody hot, bounce and shooters off the pitch. Middle of wedding party.

Batcombe 208 all out (T.Collis 2-10, Sykes 2-24, Berkeley 2-24) – 28.4 overs

London Saints 198 all out (Sykes 42, Cohen 25, Thomas 24)

Batcombe win the toss and bat

When it came to approving an appropriate boyfriend for his daughter, there is a suggestion that Paul Pearce went on Tinder himself to find a suitably pleasant lad who shared a love of football and was very good at cricket. He got the club wrong (Chelsea, not Spurs) but otherwise Paul did well. Step forward Oscar Sykes, a pleasant lad who is very good at cricket.

It was a first sighting for this correspondent and he didn’t take long to make an impression. Witham’s skipper, on loan to Batcombe, was bowled for two in Oscar’s second over. Oscar then took a smart c&b in his fourth over before recording a spectacular assist, diving forward close to the wicket to slide his fingers under a dying ball and bag Kav, Batcombe’s pugnacious skipper. It was off the bowling of Max Cohen, who bowled well all day. That made it 37-3 in the eighth over and London Saints were in the game.

And it stayed that way. Batcombe averaged seven an over throughout while losing wickets steadily. Pete Berkeley bowled two while DT and Mike McIntyre were economical. Collis Senior also mopped up the last two wickets (admittedly, one was a 9-y-o girl on debut). But we couldn’t winkle out No 4 bat Pete Slocombe who anchored the innings, ending on 87no, including 17 boundaries.

The wedding party under canvas invoked a no sixes rule for half the boundary and no doubt prevented Pete’s century. But frustratingly, he was out twice only for no balls to be called. There was also a surprising blot on Oscar’s unblemished record when he dropped a dolly – off his future father-in-law’s bowling while managing to spike himself in the ankle. That should make the wedding speech. On the other hand, Batcombe lost two wickets when hot headed batting over the boundary into the no-six zone meant automatic dismissal. It was decided by a post-match panel (DT) that Mike Mac couldn’t claim them as wickets.

Batcombe finished all out for 208 off 28.4 overs, including 40 extras due to another rule change that saw no balls and wides marked as two runs, with no extra balls bowled. A sensible rule in the heat.

Batting

Keinan                             Bowled                            Sykes                  2

Paul                                   C&B                                   Sykes                  10

Kav                                    Caught Sykes                 Cohen                8

Pete                                  Not out                                                         87

Ant                                    Bowled                            Berkeley            19

Cyrus                                Bowled                            Berkeley            6

Lurch                                6 and out                        (McIntyre)        15

Andrew Davies              Caught Sykes                  Pearce                6

Tyler                                 6 and out                        (McIntyre)        12

Tommy                            Bowled                            Collis Snr           0

Farah                                Bowled                            Collis Snr           0

Extras                                                                                                       40

TOTAL                                                                                                      208 ALL OUT (29.4)

Bowling

Sykes                                5            0            27          2

Cohen                              5            0            21          1

Berkeley                          4            0            29          2

Jackson                            1            0            17          0

Thomas                            3            0            13          0

McIntyre                         3            1            16          0

Pearce                              3            0            28          1

Collis Snr                         2.4        0            10          1

Keenan                            2            0            24          0

London Saints innings

There was a smorgasbord of cake, quiche, chicken, crisps, pork pies and sandwiches, eg., plenty of fuel for opening bat Lt Johnny Councillor Carol Wheely Bin Pidgeon Griffiths to go forth and smash LSCC into the game. Sadly, he was out first ball. As he didn’t bowl, it went down in the scorebook as TFC (Thanks for coming). Happily, there was a second cake. Collis Snr, who ended Batcombe’s innings was JG’s wingman and, with the aid of extras and Mike Mac, the score crept up to 25-1. Then 53-2 when Terrence was LBW.

And so it progressed. At four down, Max determinedly held up one end (16 singles off 20 scoring shots) while Oscar tried to get back in Pearcey’s good books by smashing 9 boundaries off 13 scoring shots). It was 131-5. Then a little slump, Mike Mac out for a duck, so too Pearcey to a Silver duck (although he outrageously altered the scorebook to read Bronze). 148-8. Cometh the hour, cometh two sexagenarians (no Pete, it’s not a compliment) in Berkeley and Thomas, who wonderfully hurried the rate along, with DT striking five boundaries. When Pete fell, it was going down to the wire.

No surely not, it couldn’t happen again. Could it? Out strode One Not Out Keenan, whose feats in this match last year inspired a T-shirt worn by half the squad in 2022. And yes, he did get a single to put DT back on strike. LSCC were 196-9, with 13 needed off the last two overs. Only for skipper Kav to unsportingly (Boo! Hiss!) bring himself back on to bowl. In attempting to get back on strike for the last over, DT mishit the last ball of the 34th over for Kav to take a C&B and another great game v Batcombe was over.

Batting

Griffiths                           Bowled                            Lurch                  0 (Golden)

Collis Snr                         LBW                                  Kav                      8

McIntyre                         Bowled                            Slocombe         13

Collis Jnr                          Bowled                            Slocombe         9

Cohen                              Bowled                            Cyrus                  25

Sykes                                Bowled                            Cyrus                  42

Jackson                            Bowled                            Gilbert               0

Pearce                              Bowled                            Cyrus                  0 (Silver/Bronze)

Berkeley                          Caught                             Hastings            11

Thomas                            C&B                                   Kav                      24

Keenan                            Not out                                                         1

Extras                                                                                                       49

TOTAL                                                                                                      198 ALL OUT (34.0)

Bowling

Lurch                  5            1            25          1

Kav                      5            1            15          2

Slocombe         5            1            20          2

Keinan               7            0            41          2

Gilbert               5            0            32          1

Cyrus                  4            0            12          3

Hastings            2            0            21          0

Farah                  1            0            9            0

Champagne moment

Oscar Sykes rose to the occasion with his girlfriend and future parents-in-law in attendance to star with bat and ball. Apart from the dolly he dropped, off Pearcey’s bowling, when he stumbled, spilled the ball and stabbed himself in the ankle with his spiked boot. Then excused himself by pointing out the blood to everybody, losing all the cool accrued to date.

Man of the Match

Oscar Sykes rose to the occasion with his girlfriend and future parents-in-law in attendance to star with bat and ball. Apart from the dolly he dropped, off Pearcey’s bowling, when he stumbled, spilled the ball and stabbed himself in the ankle with his spiked boot. Then excused himself by pointing out the blood to everybody, losing all the cool accrued to date.

However, two wickets, a brilliant catch and 42 runs doth Man of the Match make, with Max and Collis Snr on the podium. Max’s tight bowling and dogged batting took silver.

IN OTHER SPORTS

Friday

Golf: Well done Pearcey for taking the biscuit, erm, the trophy by dropping his handicap from 14 to about 186 to score 37 stableford points, followed by Max who ate the rest of the Hardto Digestives by scoring 36 off 36. Nine others brought up the field.

Quiz night: Yet again London Saints triumphed in the Witham Friary Friday night sports quiz, the team of the Cohens plus Mike Mc and Jacko this time taking 1st place following on from DT’s Team triumph in 2019, the last time the quiz was held. The Keenan-Davies-Griffiths combo again took a podium place and could have gone higher but missed Andy Jones archaic knowledge of 1970’s Aldershot footballers and Welsh batsmen.

Saturday

parkrun : 6 hardy tour party members made it out of bed after a heavy Friday night to attend The Old Showfield parkrun in Frome – 5 of the 6 ran it with Mike, sensibly saving his legs for the cricket later, supporting the other 5. The previous night’s alcohol took its effect on all of them except Jacko who proved that there is at least one athlete in the London Saints finishing in a creditable 26th place (out of 129 participants).

A must shirt for all Hampshire fans.

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